Communicating the Message of Love
Over dinner my friend Katie shared her biggest take away from taking my parenting series some years ago. She said,
“It was the simple yet profound concept of communicating the message of love. For me this means continually beaming out to focus on the big picture with my kids and let them know that I love them. I apologize for my behavior when I lose it with them. Now, they’re used to that and even though I make plenty of mistakes and am not a perfect mother, I’m certain they know how much I love them. Every day I’m aware of the value of communicating that love, even in the smallest interactions.”
How do you show your love within and beyond the many daily acts of caring --- the chauffeuring, cooking, laundering...?
The hectic pace of Thanksgiving, with all of the preparations, travel, cooking and socializing, can distract us from a grounded connection with our kids.
Can you remember someone from your own childhood who you knew cared about you? How did you know they cared? What did they do that communicated that to you?
Maybe they spend time with you, listened to you, taught you a skill or game. Below is a list of ideas, with concrete examples, for communicating the message of love. This list is a beginning. Please share your ideas in the comment section below!
Shared experiences
Play a game together (we’re into Sorry right now – especially the 14 year old!)
Cook together (favorites: eggs, lemon squares, help with prepping anything)
Learn to do something together (friendship bracelets)
Work together on a project (put together an Ikea desk, replay chess champion game moves, garden)
Wrestle and rough house• Walk the dog or take a hike
Empathetic communication
Deeply listen to your child – no devices, no interruptions.
Use phrases that convey empathy, such as:
You seem__________.
You look___________.
You sound__________.
You are____________.
Body language/tone of voice/alignment of internal and external energy
Be aware of how loving you feel on the inside. Notice how this is reflected on the outside by your facial expressions and body language. When these match you'll come across with
Soft face & open heart
Warm, relaxed tone of voice
Sincerity and empathy
With an older child closet listening is a great option.
Katie reminded me - THE MESSAGE OF LOVE is powerful!